Friday, January 11, 2013

Science Fiction Fantasy Snippet - 01/12/13



          Welcome to another Science Fiction Fantasy Saturday!  I hope everyone had a great holiday season and got in some quality reading.  For this snippet I stayed with the same WIP I worked from for my last contribution.  It focuses on a young boy, Sam, and how his colorful and unexpected family history comes crashing into his life.  The story deals with legends and lore and the power of imagination.  I hope you enjoy.  Lastly, make sure that you check out all of the snippets contributed this round by a truly talented group of writers and leave a few comments along the way.  It’s like tipping your literary waiter.

          Sam locked the brakes on his bike, eyeing the covered bridge in front of him.  A small creek flowed below it, spreading the smell of mountain laurel native to the area.  Supported by decades old railroad planks, Sam had never questioned their ability to support his weight during the timed five seconds it took him to cross.  The sight of the shadowed expanse always drew him back to his favorite ballad of one doomed Ichabod Crane and his fateful encounter with the headless rider.  His foot hovered over the pedal as he listened for the sound of approaching hoofs, glancing behind him before he jolted out over the aged timbers.   The bike’s almost flat rear wheel slowed him down as it thumped across each board, jarring his neck and shoulders with each rotation.  Sam glanced into the dark recesses of the rafters as a swirl of dust darted in from outside, catching him by surprise.  Pain shot through both eyes as he shot out the other end of the bridge.  His front wheel struck a rut in rough cut dirt road and Sam soared over the handle bars, landing head first into a bank of dandelions.
          A hoarse voice called out behind him, “It’s time, Sam.”

24 comments:

  1. Great description, and excellent set-up. Definitely want to find out more.

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  2. Thanks, T.M. I'm having fun with it and the story is shaping nicely. I appreciate the comments.

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  3. I'm with T.M. Fantastic details to describe the setting and get your reader in place for what's going to happen. Tied up quite nicely with the ominous last line.

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  4. Thanks J.M. It's always interesting to go through just ten lines and the changes you can make. It would be fun to do a whole novel snippet by snippet. Thanks for commenting.

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  5. Wow. Great description! I grew up near a covered bridge in the woods... this brought back old memories, sights, and smells.

    Great snippet, and the last line gave me chills. :)

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    1. Thanks, Ann. I've crossed a few in my youth too and drew on that. No headless horsemen though, luckily.

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  6. Very scary :) Nice going.

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  7. Thanks Tara. Mixing elements of fantasy, horror, and a dash of adventure and hoping it produces an entertaining read. I appreciate the comments.

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  8. Covered bridges, dandelions... Hmm... I think Sam must be from my neck of the woods (New Brunswick - the land of said bridges, and plentiful of weeds, to boot).

    Oh, and great descriptive passage. Nice!

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    1. I was using the area around Lancaster so kinda close. They have some great bridges out there too. Thanks for the comments.

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  9. He'll knacker that back wheel riding on a flat. Nice and atmospheric :)

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  10. Knacker the back wheel! That's awesome. I can't promise I won't use that at some point. Thanks.

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  11. It's time... to start wearing a helmet and fix that flat. Nice work!

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    1. Ha! That one made me laugh out loud. Let me know if you're available as a novel safety consultant. Could help my liability rates. Thanks.

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  12. Wow, great imagery!! That last line sorta sent some chills down my spine though. "It's time.." ahh!!

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  13. Thanks TK!! I'm still having a lot of fun with these and I'm trying to corner the market on the cliffhanger snippet. Appreciate the comments.

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    1. Thanks Pippa! Tried to foreshadow some with the headless rider comment. Glad you liked it!

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  15. Ooh, who's speaking that last line?

    Great snippet and, yay, for the Legend of Sleepy Hollow reference! :)

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  16. The Sleepy Hollow legend had some great history and plays into the story again later. The speaker of the last line is a surprise but a safe bet no one would guess who it is but also plays into our folklore. Thanks for commenting.

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  17. Loving the reference to Sleepy Hollow and the atmosphere of the snippet.

    Time for what? O.o

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  18. Hey Misa. I think it's a turn no one's expecting. Guess we'll find out. Thanks!

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