Friday, November 23, 2012

SciFi Fantasy Saturday Snippet




Hi all!  In this latest snippet from Welcome To GreenGrass, we take a minute to get a
closer look at Talyn, one of Traveller’s closest friends in the city of GreenGrass.  Talyn,
red skinned and fanged, looking much more the part of devil than devout, wears his
religion on his sleeve and finds his current situation a recurring test of his faith.  One of
the few concessions Talyn allows himself is a new found appreciation of art, specifically
creating it, but even there his new world finds a way of filtering in. Thanks for reading
and please be sure to check out all the great writers who share their work here on SciFi
Fantasy Saturday.  You’ll be glad you did. 




          Talyn stabbed the brush into a mix of green and yellow paint, sweeping the
material in broad and careless passes.  Follow the light and the light shall show me
the way.  Foregoing cleaning the bristles, he dunked the already bulging mound of paint
into the jar of red, pushing the handle harder than he intended.  All of life’s strength has
been placed within, we need only look.  By the time he added the last globs of blue,
Talyn’s breathing was heavy and sweat formed on his brow.  Look to the stars to find your    
            way home.  Running his fingers through his course black hair, Talyn hung his head low.  
          “But what happens when someone changes your stars?”
          Using the blunt end of the brush, Talyn carved a crude stick figure into the mass
of colors smeared over the canvass and watched as the paints dripped over his creation.
          “You and I, my washed over friend are both strangers in a world we didn’t ask to
be in."







20 comments:

  1. An interesting snippet...and enjoyed the last few lines. Lots of good fodder for self-reflection.

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    1. Thanks, T.M. - I'm glad you liked it. It's always fun trying to cram as much into as little here. I appreciate the comments.

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  2. Love the use of paint as an introspective medium.

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    1. Thanks, JC. I was trying to visualize the process and thought the paints brought it out right for that character.

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  3. A very nice way to externalise the thought processes. And I like the last line particularly.

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  4. Always looking for ways to show not tell. Glad it worked for you. Thanks, Peter.

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  5. Very nice! The use of paints/colours spliced in with his thoughts was brilliant!

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  6. Thanks, TK! Much appreciated. I really liked how the visual played out here and that's why I choose it for snippetdom. It plays in to how the rest of the chapter develops. Thanks for taking the time.

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  7. Not much more than I can say that has not already been said, especially regarding the integration of the paints together with his inner thoughts. Good job!

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  8. Thanks, Patrick. I'll take a reiterated good job any day.

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  9. Green and yellow, followed by red, followed by blue all without cleaning his brush? Are his thoughts supposed to be as muddy as his colors?
    BTW, Jarn's at his usual address. I apparently didn't sign up.

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  10. Hi Sue. Actually you're right on the mark. Talyn's thoughts are a reflection of his art, as messy as it seems. Thanks for the comments and the update on Jarn.

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  11. This is a very visual scene. Using the paint to represent his growing unrest works so well here. You can sense the tension building to that last great line.

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    1. Thanks for the comments JM! Glad the building tension came thru with the back and forth of thought / action. Appreciated, as always.

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  12. Interesting scene. Enjoyed the painting imagery of his conflict.

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  13. Thanks Melisse! I really appreciate you taking the time to comment. Everyone seemed to like the paints.

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  14. Sounds like a truly tortured artist!

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    1. Pippa, to some degree, all four of the central characters have a hard time dealing with their new surroundings in their own unique ways. Thanks for commenting.

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  15. This is beautiful. I love this character in this short snippet.

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  16. J M - Thanks! If I can sell Talyn's character in ten lines then I'm pretty satisfied with it.

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